Not So Perfect by Nik Perring: A Review

Not So Perfect by Nik Perring is a delightfully compact collection of equally compact ‘short-short’ stories and despite the title they are each absolutely perfect. Each tiny morsel will leave you with a lingering flavour, sometimes bitter-sweet or unusual, but always memorable and satisfying. Some of the stories may be less than a page long but Perring manages to pack more meaning into 100 words than most can in 1000.

The stories may be sprinkled with magic but raw and familiar human emotions shine through in sometimes painful ways. Perring understands his characters and never judges, simply tells their story. It’s difficult to pick a favourite story from this collection as they are all so different, some inspiring tears (‘Kiss‘) and some a rye smile (‘The Angel in the Car park‘) but ‘My Wife Threw up a Lemur’ (the story the cover art is based on) won it for me simply because it tells a familiar story in such an unusual way but never has to explain itself.

Each story is illustrated with a charming line drawing on the title page adding to the special experience that is reading this book. It’s worth mentioning that the books small format makes it perfect for carrying around in a handbag to dip into throughout the day. The only thing there seems left to ask is ‘When’s the next collection out?’

NB: Another thing worth mentioning is that Nik runs an fabulous short story appraisal service called ‘The Story Corrective’. I can say from personal experience that it is well worth the money and should you try it out you will get excellent and honest constructive feedback with a very fast (under a week) turn around.

Like Bees to Honey: A Book Launch (and a very strange date)

First, apologies: this blog post is long overdue. I attended Caroline Smailes’ Liverpool launch party for Like Bees to Honey way back in May (which brings me to the very strange date I took: more on that later) and have been intending to write a review for months. It was a fantastic experience to hear Caroline read from the book and explain how inspiration was taken from her own family’s stories and culture. So here’s the review:

Like Bees to Honey by Caroline Smailes is a book that will make you cry so be warned. You will especially cry if you have children, have ever lost anyone, have ever followed your heart rather than pleased someone, pleased someone rather than followed your heart or have in fact, ever had a regret or a family rift. This book will speak to you whoever you are.

Nina travels back to Malta with her son Christopher to reconnect with her family and culture but finds an island full of ghosts. This isn’t an ordinary ghost story though. It’s a story about people: their regrets, their mistakes, their injustices, their loves and their truths. It is a story of forgiveness: not only forgiving others, but yourself. It also includes the most original (and witty) portrayal of a (Cisk) beer swilling Jesus I have ever read, as well as beautiful descriptions of Malta and its culture. There is plenty of sadness in this book, but also humour, uplifting moments and wonderfully colourful characters.

If you are a fan of Caroline’s previous books you will be glad to see that her novel presentation of text is used to the full in this book. Lines down the side of the page (visible from the outside of the book) indicate when the ghosts are narrating and different fonts and page breaks are used to great effect. Caroline transports us into the psyche of Nina right down to the sounds and minute details she focuses on as well as the conflict between her two cultures. This is a writer who understands how people think. The story itself unfolds in a subtle way that leaves you sighing ‘ah’.

And now onto my date. Mmmn. Never take a blind date anywhere important with you, especially if you are experimenting with dating a new type (in this case people my friends think are normal). And if the first words you hear out of their mouths are ‘you don’t look anything like the picture I was shown,’ pitch them back onto the train right that moment and send them home. Don’t do what I did and say ‘Neither do you,’ and then take them to a book launch (now both feeling rather shit about yourselves (actually I‘ve lost three stone since that date so a little loss of self esteem may have been worth it)).

I feel I’m probably fairly safe in writing about this as I don’t actually think the gentleman(??) in question actually bothered to learn my name let alone my website address. Anyway, I feel I have let Caroline down a little as while she was signing my book she asked how the date was going. Thinking he was standing close to me I said it was going quite well, thank you. He wasn’t: he’d wandered off somewhere: so sorry Caroline for telling that little fib. (I was however punished for this by having to take a long train journey home with him). Especially as she was so lovely in wishing me a ‘happily ever after’ in my copy of Like Bees to Honey. Don’t worry. I will find my fairy tale ending, but it’s likely to be with my usual type of long haired or bearded eccentrics and bikers because at least they are charming and exciting (although obviously not until I’ve lost the next 1.5 st).

An Update in the Life of Me

I thought I would post a quick update about what I've been up to since my last post and what I have planned for the Summer. As far as writing events go (and I am very late in posting this) Talking Books at Chester Library in June was a fantastic night. It was great to hear successful writers, Caroline Smailes, Nik Perring and Jon Mayhew talking about their writing process and sources of inspiration. Hopefully there will be similar events in the future. I will be reviewing both Nik Perring's Not so Perfect and Caroline Smailes' Like Bees to Honey as promised in the near future so watch this space.

As far as my writing goes, I am busy polishing up some stories and also a radio play. In the spirit of my favourite activity (procrastination), I am considering sending some of my work to a professional reader before testing the market with them. Any advice on this would be welcome. The novel is still plodding along but I really need to get some wordage on paper (or screen). The summer holidays are starting next week, but I have discovered that the local soft play area has free wifi. This may just save my sanity. I'm also looking into joining a writer's group. The end of A363 has left me missing my fellow writers and their valuable comments on my work. I can't make the local group so may have to look further afield.

Finally, if you know me personally, you'll know my son, Jake had a bit of a nasty accident at school a couple of weeks ago when a bench went through his cheek. He's back at school this week and healing up well, you can hardly tell he's had 15 stitches. We're going camping this weekend and I know he's looking forward to that.

Like Bees to Honey by Caroline Smailes: The Launch Night

Lat night I attended a very important night for author, Caroline Smailes, the launch of her new novel Like Bees to Honey . It was a wonderful night and included beautiful readings from the book. It was fantastic to meet the very friendly Caroline (and get my book signed) and have a cake (or two) and a chat.

I wish I could get started on this beautiful book sooner but as you will see from my blog, I am still tangled up in the last of my uni work for the year. From the glance through I allowed myself after getting back last night, I can see that it features Caroline's usual ingenuity with the page layout and fonts making it extremely visually inviting, as does the gorgeous cover designed by Becky Adams. I can't wait to get stuck in. Expect a full review when I've finished it.

The Last Hurdle

Okay, so I'm nearly there. So far this year I have submitted over 37,000 words to the OU purely through my TMA's. I have 4000 to go and they have to be in at 12 noon next Thursday. Have I started writing them? Erm, no. The next week is going to be fairly intense. But I will get there... I will.

After that I have to wait until August for the results that will determine my degree classification. Even then it isn't quite over: I have another 15 credit points to gain to be awarded honours, so I won't actually graduate until April 2011. But the end is in sight.

So for everyone else packing up ECA's and attending exams over the next couple of weeks, before that painful 2 - 3 month wait until results day: Good Luck!

A Useful Little Site

I've just been having my usual morning stroll around the internet an have come across a useful little site called 'Creative Writing Prompts'.. Its full of those little one sentence suggestions that can fire creativity and make you think, 'Why didn't I think of doing that?'

Okay. So the site mainly appears to be an advert for various e books, but that aside, there are 346 completely free prompts and starting points available. Definitely worth a look.

A Little Bit of Light Relief

I should make it clear that the following is not mine: for more like this click here


There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer.

When asked to define great, he said, "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!"

He now works for Microsoft writing error messages.

Reading is the key to writing

So I am halfway through the uni year now and have just completed my most challenging assignment yet: a 1000 word critique of another student's work. Still very much thinking of myself as needing the guidance of other writers around me (and I don't think this will ever change), I felt incredibly under-qualified for this task. But now it's done and I realize that the things that stand out to me about other's writing are the things that I can take control of in my own. Reading is truly the key to better writing

This brings me on to one of my current projects: reading my way through the 1001 must reads before you die. Click here for a downloadable spreadsheet including everything you need to know. You can track where you are on the list and mark the books you already own. It even estimates how long you have to read the books and how many you need to read each year to succeed. The most important thing for me is not completing the list, but that it is encouraging me to read more widely and step out of my comfort zone. So far, I haven't been disappointed with a book. Take a look and see what you think.

Quick Update

It's been a bit of a break for the blog I'm afraid, and it's been a very busy time. Jake has gone of to school in his new uniform for the first time and is going to be the star in the nativity play, yes thats right, literally the star. That's going to be a bit of a costume challenge. I'm thinking sequins and cardboard. He spent a month of the first half of term off sick with Swine Flu but at least its over with now.

As for writing, I have started my Advanced Creative Writing course with the OU along side their new Children's Literature Course. I'm biting my fingernails waiting for the first creative writing grade of the year. It should be in sometime today. Eek. I'm completely deleting the opening chapters of my novel and am seriously considering writing it backwards as I have a climax I'm thrilled with and feel confident about the ending. Has anyone else done it this way?

September saw me complete the HACK for the NSPCC 24 miles turned into 27 as I got lost on the last mountain. We had fantastic weather which resulted in severe sunburn and I couldn't move for two days after. It was all worth it though. The photo below was after an hour of walking and I allowed myself a moment to watch the sunrise.

Anyway, I promise to blog more often and also have to catch up on my visiting.

Playing with Words

Today, two long awaited packages arrived from Amazon (always the best kind of delivery). Inside were the remainder of my set books for the OU course in Children's Literature starting in October. I have been devouring these books, rereading everything from Harry Potter to Little Women. To be honest, I have enjoyed them much more this time around. Of course, there is also new literature to be enjoyed, much of which arrived this morning.

One of the books in my parcel was 100 Best Poems for Children, put together by Puffin, 2001, 2002. Inside I found lots of old favourites and back came memories of school recitals and certain musicals about cats. One poem struck out at me, as I am the sort of person who likes playing with lists of words, especially when I am finding writing tough.. I write lists of words I love or hate or share sounds: I could go on. Anyway, I share it with you below.

The Word Party

Loving words clutch crimson roses,

Rude words sniff and pick their noses,

Sly words come dressed up as foxes,

Short words stand on cardboard boxes,

Common words tell jokes and gabble,

Complicated words play scrabble,

Swear words stamp around and shout,

Hard words stare each other out,

Foreign words look lost and shrug,

Careless words trip on the rug,

Long words slouch with stooping shoulders,

Code words carry secret folders,

Silly words flick rubber bands,

Hyphenated words hold hands,

Strong words show off, bending metal,

Sweet words call each other 'petal',

Small words yawn and suck their thumbs,

Till at last the morning comes,

Kind words give out farewell posies...

Snap! The dictionary closes.

Richard Edwards

Results Day

The results for my OU Creative writing course came in yesterday after days of compulsively refreshing the student homepage. This is a bad habit I am obviously not alone in as collectively we managed to crash the OU's online Student services for a day (delaying our results?). I was extremely relieved to see I had achieved a Grade 2 Pass, which, assuming I can maintain the standard next year, puts me on track for a 2:1 degree.

Things have been very busy for the last few weeks. I have moved house unexpectedly (half of my belongings are still in limbo). This resulted in some very forced 'bad' writing for a couple of weeks but I am happy to say I have managed to write something everyday. I finally came out of my funk last week when a whole short story poured out of a free write. Who knew Chicken Soup could be so inspiring.

So Quiet

Apologies for this being my first post in almost a month. I've been using the time since my course has finished to catch up on my reading and start work on editing some of my short stories and poems ready for submission. I think it's finally time to start 'getting out there' a bit. I'm mentally preparing myself for lots of slim rejection letters, but you never know and they won't get anywhere languishing on my Hard Drive.

Reading at the moment is extremely fun as I am working my way through the set books for the OU's Children's Literature course, (Any excuse to re-read Harry Potter). It has suprised me that children's books today deal with so many painful subjects such as child abuse, slavery and drugs. Having spoken to the local bookshop owner, it appears that at the other end of the spectrum, she is no longer able to stock Charlotte's Webb or many other farm yard tales due to the threat of death of animals causing complaints from parents. I'm sure this is the kind of debate the course will address.

Anyway, here's to filling some more blank pages.